Memories need a home;

I lock mine in the cellar.

These quotes are representative of my current (persistent) state of existence:

"Let me get my hands on your mammary glands."
-Steven Patrick Morrissey

"I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour; but heaven knows I'm miserable now."
-Steven Patrick Morrissey

"Hey you, you're losing your vitamin c."
-Can

"Not all mistakes are regrets."
-Joey Comeau

"Most mistakes are."
-Me

I've been getting in trouble lately. Getting caught looking at the breasts of a new friend, who's a new friend's girlfriend; getting slippery on too-strong whiskey-gingers at some fucking too-bright bar two blocks from her house that's always full of drunk assholes and girls and guys with cooler tattoos than anybody, and walking her home and slipping into places I really don't want to be; I am shamed.

This is the life I am living, or will live with. These are the mistakes I sleep with when I sleep alone, the mistakes I spoon with and cook breakfast for the morning after.

...

There's nothing like seeing the person with whom you've made the mistake to remind you the mistake you've made. Awkward hellos are a great reminder that there is no love here, there will be no snuggling afterward, no spooning as there is with these mistakes I hold so dear like trophies or gravestones. She won't have the thread to mend this broken heart. No one will until I allow them to.

Bye,
Someone who loves you,
and someone who even loves me too,
sometimes.